“The greatest gift you can give yourself now, after 90 minutes in this room, is a perfect Savasana.”

she said as she faded the lights out and turned off the heating. And I lay there, on my back, after the fifth out of my ten Bikram Yoga days, pearls of sweat running down my waist, thinking about.. nothing.

I feel and see some progress in class. I notice that I can stretch further, I can finally touch my forehead to my stretched out knee, and today I managed to keep balancing in my best effort to do my favourite of the 26 asanas, the standing bow, until the instructor released us. It’s all a process, you go deeper into the poses, you start understanding them, you learn that by sliightly turning your toes inwards, you suddenly manage to almost do the triangle – yay! It’s a beautiful art that challenges your mind in many ways, and the sweating feels absolutely wonderful.

Standing Bow Pose. Photo: Bigstock Photo

And what about later? What happens when I leave the yoga studio? Frankly, not much. I step out of the hot room, there is no tension in my muscles, I take a cold shower and feel relaxed, calm and energized – and that’s pretty much it. I don’t really try bending my spine back into a 90 degree angle at any other point of the day or standing on one leg forming a “Capital T, as in Terrific! Leg up, arms stretched forward, stretch, strech, stretch! Come down. And exhale.” 

Balancing Stick Pose. Photo: Bikram Yoga North Miami Beach

I’m am sure the yoga has a positive effect on my body, especially along with the amounts of water I’m drinking and fruit I’m eating as a part of this little detoxing project. (Except when I find displaced chocolate.) My pores feel flushed out, I get a moment to turn off the mind and my ego skips with joy at any small progress. I am, however, longing for some muscle pain and action. I want to feel that I’ve been working out, I want to feel stronger, lift heavier, jump higher, push that one more time, hit that tennisball really hard with the racket in a more controlled forehand, or something. Explosive energy, dancing, laughter. My cup of tea.

From all the stories I heard about bikram before, I was afraid it would be completely exhausting and painful, and I was actually looking forward to the torture. However, it’s not as much that, as it maybe is quite dehydrating, although I’m not even really noticing that. But then again, those of you who know me well, know that I have a slightly strange body that seldomly asks me for water, food, sleep, or a toilet. “You were made for working in the field!” a former colleage once exclaimed.

And maybe that’s what I should do then. Go somewhere. After my Savasana.

Savasana. Photo: MokshaChallenge